


Stray

by raptors



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Canon Continuation, F/M, Post-Mass Effect 3, Shepard Survives
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 06:26:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3967840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raptors/pseuds/raptors
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After destroying the Reapers, Shepard finds herself back on Earth. With no word from the Normandy crew she begins a new life, but starting over is never that easy. Contains Mass Effect 3 spoilers and Fem!Shep x Garrus</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. No More Commander Shepard

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired to write a continuation of Shepard's story, based on the perfect ending of Mass Effect 3. I'm still new to this fandom, so some of my lore might be off, but I'm trying! I'm also using this to get in the habit of writing in first person so I'm sorry if it's a little awkward. I hope to update this twice a week during summer. Thank you!

My body was mangled and broken. My skin pickled with the burns kept at bay by my shock or adrenaline or I don't know what but I knew soon they would be pure agony. I smacked my dry lips never aching for water more in my life. 

I don't know how long it was. Minutes, hours, days. I slipped in and out consciousness just to wake to the darkness under the rubble that kept me trapped. I didn't allow myself hope that someone would find me. I thought I might already be dead. 

"Hey!" Yelled a man with deep, coarse voice that cut through the wreckage. "There's one over here!" 

The pressure on my leg lifted instantly and I realized how little feeling I had had in it before. I moaned with pleasure at the idea of being able to move it again. 

"Whoa," the voice said. 

"She's alive," said another. 

A small team of soldiers had quickly removed the rubble until they could free my body. Carefully, as if they could break me more by the simple act of carrying me, they transported me on to a long, flat board. I opened my eyes all the way, gasping at how much the sunlight burned after being trapped for so long. 

A tanned and scarred woman held a water bottle to my lips. I had never tasted anything so luxurious. I drank and I drank until I had emptied her supply. 

"Holy shit," breathed a young man with dark hair. "You alright? What's your name?" 

I tried to speak but my words got caught in my mouth. I hacked out some phlegm that had settled, which took all my energy. 

The woman gave him a light shove. "Screw off, can't you see what she's been through?" 

"I'm," I took a small breather. "I'm fine." 

The woman bowed her head. "I have to disagree there, miss. You're covered in burns and your leg, well, you probably shouldn't look at that right now." 

"But she's alive!" Yelled the man "Almost no one survived the Citadel crash. Look at her armor, she's a soldier, that's how she got through it. Alliance officers are tough shit." 

They carried me on the board to their settlement a few miles from the crash site. From there I was transported by truck to a bigger colony. I was still losing consciousness, but I had gathered we crashed on Earth, and landed in the hands of military. 

I woke up one morning in a hospital room. The room smelled more like smoke than the sharp stench of medicine and death I was used to. I put a hand to my face. I felt like it had been snacked with a waffle iron on one side, and my hair crumbled in my hands on one side. I had had some close calls with death, but never quite like this. 

I tried to move but my leg was in a heavy cast, and I was tired, so tired, from just sitting up. "Hello?" I called towards the door. After a few minutes I called again but there was no answer. 

I sank my head back in to the pillow. How much time had passed since the attack? Did we beat the Reapers? Did the Normandy survive? Did Garrus survive? 

Oh Garrus, I thought. We had plans. We were going to have a life after this war. We were talking about kids. What if he didn't make it? 

No, I told myself. I can't think about that. There had been so much loss and pain in the world lately and I didn't know how much more I could take. I couldn't let myself think he was dead. I couldn't let myself hope he was alive. I had to force myself not to think about him. It was hard. Every turn I took in my thoughts his face was there. 

After several hours of wrestling with my own damn head the door slammed open. A woman who looked like she was in her late twenties came busting in. She took one look at me and started apologizing over and over. 

"I didn't think you'd be awake! You weren't supposed to wake today so I took off to see them setting up the candle ceremony for Commander Shepard. Don't tell the doc, please." 

"It's," I stopped and cleared the gunk from my throat. "It's fine. Look, I just need some answers." 

"But, what? Oh! You must be starving I'll get you some dinner." She left without listening to my protests. 

Candle ceremony for who?

She returned moments later with a bowl of brown goo with a piece of brown bread on the side. "It ain't much," she said, "but at least I think they're moving you soon. You look like military but had no identification on you so we didn't know where to put ya."

I looked up at her lined face. "How long have I been out?"

She shrugged. "Don't know. Been about a week since the Crucible. What's the last thing you remember?"

Flames.

"Hey, what's your name anyway?" she asked.

"Commander Jenna Shepard."

She stared blankly at me for a moment and laughed with little snorts. "Oh okay. No really, I need a name for the form." A small beep came from her omni-tool. "Hey, I'll be right back."

After years of having my face plastered all over every news source I felt a little shocked I wasn't recognized right away. I assumed everyone, especially military knew who I was by now. It was, kind of refreshing not having the person across from you knowing more about you than you do yourself.

The woman came back in a few minutes later with a wheelchair. Doc will be in later to figure you out. In the meantime he said if you're up for it you can go to the candle ceremony with me."

I let her take me. It took a few moments to get settled in to the wheel chair after awkwardly struggling with the poor nurse to load me in. It was different not being in control of my own movements, but also people just waving me off like I wasn't even there when I had always been in command of the conversations.

I was so curious however what the candlelight ceremony would be. If they didn't know I was Shepard, what was it for?

When we arrived we were both handed a small candle and directed to an area where I would be able to see from the chair. At the front of the gathering crowd and in front of the setting sun was a small makeshift stage

When it was finally dark enough a light clicked on over the stage and a flame was passed around until everyone had a lit candle. An official looking gentleman stepped on stage with a microphone, and cleared his throat. "Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here tonight to honor the memory of the great Commander Shepard, who laid down her life to save the galaxy from the Reapers."

I'm dead?

The man went on to outline my history and greatest accomplishments. He left out the good parts. The people I met, the friends I made, and the family I traveled with who really were the ones responsible for my success. I owed everything to them but here I was taking all the credit and there was nothing I could say or do, since they probably wouldn’t believe me. How strange that would be to stand up in front of dozens honoring my memory and announce I was alive. The one person who I had told my name to didn't believe me, what would these other people think.

People in the audience teared up. A few stepped on stage to talk about times we had met briefly or what I had inspired them to do. Commander Shepard wasn't just me anymore. Commander Shepard was an icon who led people to do the right thing whether I was there or not. Commander Shepard was not a falling apart soldier, in a wheelchair, with a waffle iron face and hair burnt to a crisp.

"Hey," I called to the nurse who had tears streaming down her face. "What happened to the crew of the Normandy?"

She sniffed and wiped away the tears with the back of her hand. "No one's heard anything since they crashed after the Crucible was released.”

My heart sank. I had expected this, but it didn’t make it hurt any less. I broke down right then and there sobbing for my friends. The nurse put a hand on my shoulder.

“We’ll all miss her.”

There was no more Commander Shepard was there?


	2. Ghosts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard and her new teammate go on a mission to ease tensions in their sector. Shepard deals with the ghosts of her Normandy family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I'd release a few chapters within a few days of each other to give y'all a feel for the story. Still getting used to writing in first person, but I think I'm getting better! Thanks for reading! (PS: I have no knowledge of military rankings, I tried, I'm sorry.)

I spent two years on Earth. Two years as a foot soldier in a reemerging army. I took care of people on earth, running supplies breaking up power struggles and playing peace maker across North America.

After the candle ceremony for Commander Shepard I made a choice that I couldn't take away this powerful idea of who people thought I was. My choices and my death inspired people in a way I knew I wouldn't be able to do anymore. After hearing the Normandy crashed, with no contact, there was no part of that life I could return to.  
When I was interrogated by the doctor I told him my name, but changed my last. The military records were so scrambled from the attack no one could confirm or deny Jenna Anderson was an Alliance soldier. The name seemed like a well enough tribute to my old mentor and friend.

I cried a lot for my old life. I cried for my Normandy family. I cried for Garrus. One by one over the next two years I let them go as best I could, but I still felt their ghosts hanging around me. I began to wonder if they would ever leave me.

I was stationed in what was once Las Vegas. It got hit hard by the reapers being such a large city. Its isolated location made it hard to get troops here during the war, and the place was pretty much leveled. Now it was needed as a waypoint between other major cities. The dry desert air took some getting used to, but overall it was not bad.

I had noticed being on the ground, sleeping in tents, and running drills with the soldiers again, my body had become leaner and tougher. I never realized how good we had it up in our ships. My skin darkened in the heat, and my hair, which had grown out longer than it had been since my trainee days had lighted several shades in the sun. I looked like a different person, waffle-iron face and all.

I shared a green tent with another soldier, Andela. She was a nice enough girl, a few years younger than I, but we got along fine enough, as long as we both respected the imaginary line between our bunks. I imagine that’s what it would have been like growing up with a sister.

“Anderson, Andela!”

Andela groaned sitting up in her bunk. “The fuck does he want? We’re off the clock for the day.”

“Better go see what he wants,” I told her. “That vein in his neck is going to pop any day now, and I don’t want to be the one responsible for it.”

We both stepped out in to the late-afternoon heat and saluted. “Captain.”

“Ladies.” The captain was a big man covered with scars and tattoos. He had earned his rank by keeping a settlement outside Los Angeles alive during the war. “Special assignment. I think you’ve bother proved yourselves worthy.”

Andela lit up. “Finally! What’s the deal?”

“Some kid has claimed one of the old casinos as his base, running some sort of makeshift gang out of it, claiming all kinds of territory. Could be problematic. I need someone to check it out and put a stop to it if need be.”

“We’re you’re girls, Cap!” yelled Andela

The two of us loaded up in to a van the next morning with a handful of other men and moved closer to the historic Strip. Andela was practically bouncing off the walls.

“Think he’s thinking about promoting us?” she asked.

I shrugged. I didn’t exactly relish in the idea of being in charge again. To many lives riding on me, I didn’t want to go through that again. Andela on the other hand didn’t look at the big picture enough, I wasn’t sure she would make a good leader either.

“We’re as close as I’m going to get ladies,” said the driver. “Let me know if you guys need back up and I’ll release the hounds.” He gestured towards the men.

“We’ll be fine,” I told him. “Thanks.”

We hit the ground and moved quickly under the cover of falling buildings and rubble left over from the war. The Strip had yet to be reclaimed. I wasn’t sure why I thought these buildings would make good apartments for the refugees instead of sticking them all in tents. Must be too many places for our small forces to weed out the backdoor deals and threats. 

We entered an old parking garage and moved quickly towards the doors. There weren’t any guards at this one, but we could seem them near the main entrance. Luckily there were still many gaming machines keeping in the spirit of the old city. Many had been upgraded, and a few were ripped out. It was the perfect playground for someone who didn’t want to be seen.

“What are the chances of the elevators being up?” whispered Andela.

“Is anything on this missions ever easy?” We moved towards the back of the main floor. “They’re probably guarded if they are. Just head for that staircase up ahead.”  
We slipped in to the in-case-of-fire stairs. I breathed a sigh of relief then I saw it was carpeted and not anything that would make loud noises. “20th floor.” I smiled back at Andela.

“Are you serious?” she angrily whispered at me.

When we arrived at the 20th floor intel had told me the leader’s office was located on we stopped to catch our breath before slowly opening the door. We were in the hotel part of the building now. The suites were located on this floor, so it was clear why this guy would want to set up shop here.

“I don’t see anyone,” I whispered. “Stay close.”

I lead the way in a half crouched position moving past a series of doors. I peeked my head around the corner and saw two men guarding it. “Found him.”

“Want me to take them out?”

“We’re not here to start a war. I’ll use singularity on them to keep them busy while we go inside.”

Andela nodded at me. 

I threw the blue ball of light at the vorcha, hearing them yell in panic as they helplessly floated in circles. The two of us jogged down the hallway and slipped in to the leader’s room.

“Who the hell are you!?” called the raspy voice of a man. He held a pistol in his hand, but it he still didn't look more then 20 years old.

 

“Hey, hey,” I said slowly putting my hands up. “We’re not here to start a fight. We just want to talk.”

“Well… talk fast!” He stood behind a heavy desk with mismatched furniture strewed about the room. It was obvious there had been some fights here.

I stepped closer, hoping Andela would mirror my moves. “We’re just getting a little worried here, what with your operations growing so fast. We don’t want unnecessary conflict when we’re just trying to rebuild here.”

“This is my building! Mine!” He yelled.

“See the thing is though, it’s not.” I spoke as softly as I could not wanting to trigger him. “It belonged to people before the war and once the dust settles its owners will want it back.”

He pointed the pistol at me with forced. “No! My father said it was mine! I’m in charge here! The Seekers Guild has claimed this area!”

“Calm down,” I said forcefully.

“You’re not welcome here, this is my-“ he was cut off suddenly as Andela fired a bullet in his head.

“ASHLEY! WHAT THE HELL?” I yelled at her.

“Come on, we gotta move!” she barked at me. “Hey, we need pickup ASAP!”

I stood horrified, looking at his body like he was Wrex from all those years earlier.

“Come on,” Andela tugged at my arm. “We gotta move!”

I followed her mindlessly. Shooting at any men that appeared from around the corners. We ran through the building, and took the elevator down. I used my biotics to blast our welcoming party at the bottom and we booked it out the front doors with bullets firing around us. The van peeled around the corner and provided cover fire as we dove inside. We caught our breath and made our way back to camp with no words.

I stepped out and headed right towards the showers.

“Hey!” Andela called after me. “What the hell happened to you back there?”

“Back off,” I barked at her still rushing towards the showers. “Just go write up the report will you.”

 

I stood in the shower with my heart pounding. Why did I decide to become a soldier? Why did I come back? I thought civilians would need me after the war, not that I would be back shooting up criminals. What if what we did just started another conflict here?

The shower clicked off and I sank down to the floor and clutched my wet legs to my chest. I felt alone here. Everyone was welcoming, but I had kept everyone at an arm’s length knowing they too could die at any second. I missed my friends.

I brought a hand up to touch my tattoo on my right shoulder. It was an abstract picture of the explosion that had taken my life away from me. I wanted to preserve the moment like Jack had done with her tattoos. In a way it felt like a tribute to her.

I hoped she was still out there, but I didn’t have access to the tools to look for her like I had had as a Spectre. A small part of me wished we get more action here and some of her biotics would come provide back-up, but so far out out-post had seen little action compared to the rest of the galaxy that was now scrambling to make claims on a much larger scale than we had saw today.

I rotated my leg to look at my only other tattoo. A pink flower growing up the back of calf. I had gotten for my mother. Garrus used to trace it with his sharp fingers and make comments about Earth’s flora I think he meant to be sexy.

I burst out laughing, letting my voice echo off the tiled walls.

Maybe I didn’t have to forget them.


End file.
